I am an atheist, person who denies the existence of any entity related to GOD or GOD itself. My orientation has always been strongly supported by two real facts of my life. One, I am a scientist who believes that scientists have all the answers to every question of living creature of this Universe and Second, I am a strong believer in KARMA.
It’s February 14th, 2013, Valentine’s Day, day to celebrate love. I was celebrating it with my love, on a romantic date, over a candlelight dinner which I had planned for him. I was expecting a surprise from him to make my day memorable, and as expected, he did surprise me. I will never be able to forget this date and moment through the entire life of mine. He left, never to come back. I want someone to wake me up from this horrifying dream.
I was screaming inside “please wake me up!!! It’s a dream, it can’t be true. This is the most dreadful dream I had ever dreamt of. How could I lose everything in one day, my career, my love, and my life?” My eyes are trying hard to hold my sanity back, which is ready to break the barrier and want to flow out in form of tears.
I want to run away from all the questioning eyes tearing me inside out but seems like there is no strength left in my body to move even an inch. I closed my eyes for a while, took a deep breath, gathered myself, and came out of the restaurant. I was scared of going home, so I kept walking. Until today morning, I had a successful career in one of the top research centers in the United States, a beautiful villa, loving fiancée and a name known to everyone in the industry. Now, I am wondering on the streets alone, like a nomad. I am still in a belief that whatever is happening to me is a dream, it’s not real. I closed my eyes tightly so that I can wake myself up, but all my efforts were in vain. When I opened my eyes, I saw myself standing in front of a small yet beautiful Church. Next moment, I found myself opening the door of the Church, and a silky voice of a girl, singing a prayer, melted in my ears. The voice was divinely beautiful, soothing, and enchanting, for a while I forgot that an atheist is standing at the door of a Church. I could not resist myself entering into the building, as I wanted to see the person with the enchantingly sweet voice. When I saw her, a feeling of soothing surprise and dismay ran through my heart. She was a beautiful girl with oceanic blue eyes, which held the promise to light up so many hearts. But, there wasn’t any light in her’s- SHE WAS A BLIND GIRL. Her abrupt pause forced me out of my thoughts.
She said in soft voice “You came at the right place. You will get all your answers here.”
I smiled and said “I did not come here in search of an answer. It’s your voice which leads me here.”
With a smile, she asked me again “Are you sure, you are not seeking your answers from GOD?”
I sternly told her “I am an atheist. I do not believe in GOD.”
She spoke to me in the same soft voice of her “which means you are a person who experiences the facts and after analyzing them, believes in them. So if you see GOD by yourself, will you believe in HIM?”
I asked in the same stern tone “Have you ever seen HIM?” I realized immediately that I had asked a wrong question. Embarrassed on my question, I started biting my lips.
She said in same calm voice “Yes.”
I was startled “But, How can you see HIM as your eyes…” I cut my tongue again for being so ruthless.
She said with her divine and confident smile “That’s how. What you cannot see with your open eyes, you can see clearly with closed ones. Do you want to see HIM? If yes, then just close your eyes and listen to the voice of your heart.”
I laughed, turned around, and said “Thank you, my dear, but I am not interested. It was nice meeting you though, you do have a beautiful voice.”
While I was marching towards the door, she shouted in her angelic voice “Don’t you think that it’s worth a try? You can’t lose anything. Maybe your faith will become more concrete on the denial of HIS existence.”
Without facing towards her I nodded my head and said – “OK. I am going to do it but just once only.”
I closed my eyes and a clear vision of Mother and her newborn child were floating in front of me. It was so real that I was completely lost in that vision and suddenly a slant of white light had covered the entire vision. With a jolt, I was out of that trance and I turned around to talk to her. To my dismay, she was nowhere in sight. I went close to the Altar, where she was standing, there was nothing except one full-length mirror, showing a clear image of ME. I realized that my inner self was playing hide and seek with me. I WAS REALLY HAPPY AS MY BLINDNESS HAD BEEN CURED FOREVER. I left a note at the altar “HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY TO MY NEW FOUND FRIEND.”
Today, After 4 years, I realized that whatever happened that day was a blessing in disguise. whenever I go to that church, I hear the same nostalgic voice of that girl, but this time from inside.
– Nidhi GS (Gratitude)
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